Yankees Demand MLB Move Them To A.L. Central Now
After coughing up a five run lead in the bottom of the ninth on Sunday and then getting shut out twice in Atlanta, the best team money can’t buy Bronx-Bummers have now dropped below .500 for the first time in over three decades.
They are like 100 games behind the Orioles and 6.5 out of the last wild-card spot.
The fat lady in New York has sung, got drunk and took a cab home. It’s over.
Now their management, after to whining to the MLB about getting a balanced schedule (they said Houston played Oakland too many times), have now demanded to be moved to the A.L. Central effective August 20.
Their embattled GM Brian (I’m no A.J. Preller) Cashman minced no words: “We spent all this money on all these players and our record is dog crap. We should be placed in the A.L. Central immediately where we can compete with no budget loser teams like Detroit, Kansas City, Cleveland, Minnesota and the White Sox. Right now we’d only be 2.5 games out. Why should the Twins be in the worst division in baseball? We are the damn Yankees and we expect you to ask how high when we say jump! No one gives a rats ass about Minneapolis. They don’t even have their own TV network!”
The MLB had no comment at press time, but assured New York they would continue to redact their cheating scandals from all investigations.
“We’ll continue to blame Houston,” Rob Manfred said, “for causing all your anguish by moving to the American League. We’ll dock them a couple more draft picks and make them keep the roof open on 100 degree days. That’s our permanent fall-back position.”
JOHN FREDERICKS:
MLB MONEY LINE WAGERS FOR Thursday August  17 2023
2023 MLB Godzilla Season Stats
250-210-1 -$725
*Based on all wagers at $100 per game at money or run line odds as specified in Draft Kings. Note: If money line is -$150, we are laying $150 to win $100, etc.  If we take +$130 and we win, we win $130 for our $100.
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August 17 2023
Well, we finally popped a two-fer yesterday and won +$200, trimming our season deficit to minus – $725. One day at a time, as they say.
I like one game today.
D-Backs (Even) at PODS
Arizona is hanging on for dear life at 1.5 games back of the last wild card while San Diego has choked down the lane and is 4.5 back. The D-Backs go with their ace Zac Gallen while the Padres wheel out Rich Hill. I cannot bet on Rich Hill against anybody except the A’s and Royals.
Pick: Snakes (Even)
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