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Yankees Ask MLB To Finish Season Online With Video Games

Yankees Ask MLB To Finish Season Online With Video Games

The New York Yankees, losers of seven straight games and having quietly eliminated themselves from playoff contention, have asked Major League Baseball to let them finish out this miserable season on Zoom calls with video games.

“Our players spend a lot of time in the video room, not watching game tape, but playing video games,” one high ranking Yankees official commented, who is not authorized to speak to the press.

“The season is a bust, and our players really don’t want to face the drudgery of coming to the ballpark every day. It’s a grind, and most have checked out anyway. They all just want to go home, but of course, they want to get paid on the first and fifteenth. We call them first and fifteenthers. This would also save other teams travel cost and they can rest their veterans, too. It’s a win-win.”

Major League Baseball, which is basically a wholly-owned subsidiary of the New York Yankees, is said to be considering the option. “I think it offers a lot fan engagement and could serve as a beta-test to attract gamers who are not our fans,” said Rob Manfred, a tool of the Yankees who masquerades as MLB baseball commissioner. “If the Yankees say jump, our mission is to simply ask, “how high? It’s a great relationship.”

JOHN FREDERICKS:

MLB MONEY LINE WAGERS FOR Saturday August  17 2023

2023 MLB Godzilla Season Stats

252-212-1  Minus -$845

*Based on all wagers at $100 per game at money or run line odds as specified in Draft Kings. Note: If money line is -$150, we are laying $150 to win $100, etc.  If we take +$130 and we win, we win $130 for our $100.

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August 20, 2023

After going a lousy 1-2 yesterday, we slipped to minus -$845 on the season. We need to reel off a ten game winning streak!

Seattle at Houston (-160) 

Houston is not getting swept by the Mariners at home. The Astros have a big edge in pitching in this game with Hunter Brown and a stacked offense that will break out of this slump in a major way. They’ve scored two runs in two games. This is a must win game for Houston as the Mariners are breathing down their back. They have trailed early in the first two games of this series. That will change today.

Pick: Astros (-160) 

Boston (EVENB) at Yankees 

I bet Cole yesterday at -160 and was down 6-0 when I turned the game on. I’m done. This Yankees could give a rats ass.

The Red Sox are hitting again and have averaged 5.4 runs a game in their last seven games while hitting .270 as a team.

The Yankees are mailing it in. Their team average over the last week in .188, while their opponents have averaged 6.5 runs against them. Pathetic.

Pick: Boston (Even) 

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